Why did I do that? I knew I was fragile this morning.

I woke up needing to work, needing to feel good about myself. If you can’t get paid, get good. It isn’t all about money. Right now, it’s about craft. Dig in, boy.

I had a great meeting last night with J. She gave me wonderful guidance on the craft as always. I feel my ego fighting to present itself less and less every time we meet, but it’s still there. The need to say “yes, I thought that too…” now only comes when it’s true - but it still serves no purpose other than serving my self-worth, and like a first pass line of dialogue, without purpose, why is it there? Cut it. Ah well, living is reliving.

Back to the action, I had some great notes and was ready to work - and I did. Cracked through 8 pages of late Act 2b stuff into Act 3 work that joyfully came thick and fast thanks to the lessons I’ve absorbed along the way. Feeling full of myself, I thought I’d check the Beeb, see if United and Spurs had kicked off. I’ve even changed my BBC bookmark so it goes straight to the sports page and NOT the news page because I’m not to be trusted with matches, absinthe, and Trump.

I clicked “News”. White genocide. Bullying in the oval office. Humiliation of diplomats. Cock fighting just because he knows no other way to please himself.

And down he goes. It looks like a liver shot. I don’t think he’s getting back up from that.

I didn’t even read the article. At this point, I don’t need to. I know the news sources are biased and, in many cases, will skew the information, but I have seen him enough to know who he is, and what he does. I don’t need the biased or unbiased report. He is what he is, and he wanted to step on someone today.

I didn’t go back to the screenplay. That will have to wait until tomorrow. Fortunately, it’s in a good place and the end is in sight. Hopefully, writing my first post on Substack is the catharsis needed to let get back to writing later tonight - something else though. Something creative, not about a bully. Not about a mean little man who made the news today, oh boy.

I read the news today, oh boy.